A harrowing dream reminded me how difficult detachment really is if something harsh disturbs our life—like unemployment. In my dream I had been laid off from a huge corporation. My dream-self felt middle-aged and therefore I was without hope of ever getting a job again. As the dream was ending, I was heading home, dreading to have to share the news—yet the sky was sunny and great office towers glittered in the distance. My dream memory then produced my actual age—an age when almost no one works any more. That woke me up—but the residual feelings were still unpleasantly there.
Was my ill-named Unconscious compensating for my frequently repeated praises of “detachment” as a kind of cure-all? The dream seemed to say: “Wake up already! Have a taste of the real thing!” In dreams the conscious mind is absent; the emotions have free reign. Yes. I tend to understate the difficulties when the challenges are harsh. When we are young detachment takes a much more active form: Grin and bear it, Stiff upper lip, When things get tough the tough get going. Yes. Detachment is too technical a word. Mindfulness is better. Getting hold of one’s emotions is what’s indicated. While in this valley we can’t really detach completely. Never mind sovereignty. Can’t have it here. Other people are involved, the good of the community. What we can do is act responsibly—while practicing stoicism and holding fast to our faith in the reality beyond us, even when it shows no sign of presence. What we often need is prayer—and faith that it will all work out.
I hope I got the message. I don’t want that dream recurring. I’d better face the bitter cold out there, the treacherously slippery sidewalks, and go out on a long walk, not the wimpy short one. Then next time I might dream of Florida in February, the highlight of our 2012.
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